Sale! In the Days of My Youth I Was Told What It Means to Be a Man: A Memoir

★★★★★ A Masterpiece. Beautifullly written eploration of truth, legacy and deception. I loved this book. Tom is a bold and gifted truth-teller to his emotional core. Yes, it is beautifully written, yes, a deeply personal story, but the reader cannot help but reflect on their own experiences, perhaps less dramatic, but significant to the trajectory of our lives. Tom does the seemingly impossible task of showing empathy while demanding accountability as we journey with him to untangle and unearth a confusing and secretive past. (That turns out to be incredibly interesting albeit tangled.) The discovery that he had become complicit in a cover-up out of loyalty and love, the value of truth, the courage to expose secrets, makes this story relevent and an important read.

★★★★☆ Troubling. I am really emotionally divided on this memoir. On the one hand, it's beautifully written and I found it hard to put down. The writing is clear and the story of Junod's father compelling. On the other hand, as a woman reading this book, I am beyond horrified that there should be any paean to Lou Junod. He was a selfish, self-absorbed man who appears to have left a trail of destruction. Towards the end of the book, the writer is asked by an interlocutor if he is angry at his father. Tom Junod says no, because so many aspects of his character and being are the result of being raised by this man. That surprised me, and bothers me on many levels. Emotions (anger) are not value judgments, but it sure felt like it (silence = approval). That has left me very unsettled. It's a good read, but I'll be interested in hearing reviews from other women.

★★★★★ this one stays with you. Really well written, makes you think and feel about families and fathers. The ending was strong and had me in tears